Last Monday I woke up to my parents' unintelligible argument over breakfast. It went on for five minutes. When I get to the table to have my meal, the two of them were already in truce. My mother having finished her food left my father, me and my sisters at the table. When she was already out of hearing, he complained how stubborn she can get sometimes. Me and my sisters just exchanged knowing looks.
For as long as I can remember, this has been the norm in their life together. One is complaining how impossible the other one is without knowing that they both have the same thing to say to each other. They are not your sweet couple who would whisper sweet nothings to each other's ears. They would argue over trivial matters. From how to cook the eggs to who will get up to get some water. It is a miracle that they have lasted for 33 years of marriage when they have nothing good to say to each other. I have never seen my father gave my mother chocolates, roses or anything typical to all couples who want to show affection towards their beloved. He had never dated her on Valentine's Day! And I had never seen her kissed him affectionately. Come to think of it.
Are they happy? Would you consider them having a successful married life? By God's grace, they have produced 7 children. All grown-up now and still have their marriage solidly intact. In fact they will be celebrating their 34th wedding anniversary on December 27, 2009.
No one will ever think that this kind of marriage will last judging by the standards you can read in magazines and books. But they are able to show that conforming with the standards set by the experts is not a guarantee to make the marriage last.
What is their secret? I have yet to know.