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I filed a three-day vacation leave from work. I am feverish with excitement for the coming holidays. Not only because my siblings are coming home but another member of the family is about to come anytime from now. My sister Uvy is going to give birth to her first baby and today she did not report for work. The way I look at her, she is getting heavy day by day. I know how difficult it is for mothers to carry such a burden for nine months. It is like carrying a baggage 24/7 without the opportunity to put it down. Oh my, the joy and difficulty of motherhood. I have not experienced it yet but my two sisters did. I am worried on the other hand. I feel a knot in my stomach that won't go away no matter how much I try to push it out of my thoughts.

Yesterday, as I am watching my sister, I want to come to her and hug her but I did not do so. I am afraid that she will see my tears. My mind went back to the time when she was seven years old sitting on a chair very much engrossed with her coloring book painstakingly coloring the drawings on every page. And now, she is already a fully grown woman about to give birth to her first baby. At the back of my mind I was wishing that she had not married yet and that we will finish law school together. But well, our fate is not the same. She has ventured into another road and I also took my own journey. Oh God, how much I wanted to cry. I want to see my siblings; to hug and kiss them as the wave of loneliness touched the shore of my heart. This is always the pain that an eldest child has to bear. I may look strong in front of them but deep inside me I am crying. If only we could be together forever; but I know I am wishing for the impossible as they have their own lives to lead. This is the sad truth that I have to live with.

I just got a perfect gift for my very dear friend and classmate Dimple. I thought of it when my office mate opened a printing business that specializes on tarpaulin printing, personalized mugs and anything that could be personalized. He is also venturing into Business Logo Design. It is rather new but he is gaining a lot of customers.

I thought of giving my friend a personalized mouse pad with her picture and that of her husband when I saw my office mate brought a sample in the office. I like it so I ordered one for my friend. I got the picture from her Facebook account without her knowing about it. I am sorry Dimps but I did with a good intention. It was delivered to me the next day and so I was able to give it to her just in time for Christmas. I was so happy seeing her smile. I laughed when she said that she will put it in a frame instead of using it as a mouse pad.

I am very well ready for Christmas. I have prepared 20-peso bills for the kids who will come to our house to sing Christmas carols. I already wrapped my gifts for my sisters. And I am going to have a three-day vacation leave as I am excited for my sister to give birth anytime from today. Since I am going home to my parents for the holiday, I am not sure if I can get online there. So as early as now, I would like to greet all of you who take the time to read this post. Merry Christmas and a happy New Year to you.
Lately, I noticed that I get uncomfortable whenever I wear my office uniform. It seems like I cannot breath as it is too tight. The buttons of my blouse look like they are going to fly away anytime especially the ones near my tummy area. Yesterday, as I wore my blouse, it does not fit well like it used to do before. It made me feel awkward. Okay, I have to face my problem. I am gaining weight. You see, when I am stressed out, I would eat non-stop like a glutton. I guess my frequent visits to Mc Donald's has a lot to to with my “excess baggage”. It is so disgusting to see my tummy protruding, ewwww!

I looked back at the start of the current year and remembered my New year's resolution. I am so disappointed with myself. Whatever happened to my eat healthy resolve? This morning, I decided that I am going to shed some pounds starting tomorrow. If only I can hire a personal trainer Long Beach to help me with my dilemma. However, thinking of Christmas that is just two days away, makes it more difficult for me to control my food intake. I want to postpone dieting since I feel lazy during holidays. I may not curb my food consumption but I will try best to do some exercise every morning. How I wish there is a fitness class here like Long Beach personal training that I can enroll to. Well, with or without it, I really have to exercise or I will be having a miserable time come January when I have to wear my uniform again.

I went to school early as I have an examination schedule in Criminal Law. Although I have read my book but still I am worried because I am not sure if I have absorbed all that I read.  As I was anxiously waiting for the bell to ring, I talked to my classmates about the exam.   We were discussing about the coverage of the exams which will start from Title One of Revised Penal Code Book Two up to Homicide.  Well, if I am to be asked about the elements of the crimes that we discussed, I can give one of the common elements which is, the offender is a public officer.  The elements of Rebellion are something that I have memorized by heart because of its mnemonics, P.U.T.A. which stands for public uprising and taking up of arms against the government.  This I have learned from my professor in Criminal Law.  Although I have studied my lessons, still I am not confident that I can answer all the questions.  I was fervently praying that a miracle would happen.  That my professor will just say that the exam will be cancelled and will be re-scheduled next year.  I was crossing my fingers.

My professor came to class early.  We fell silent awaiting every word that he will say.  When he opened his mouth to speak, the miracle happened indeed!  He announced that he will make our Christmas merry by postponing the exam and will be re-scheduled later after Christmas break.  All of us inside the room were rejoicing over this new development.  I felt so relieved.  It gave me more time to study.  I went home early with Dimple and her husband.

No time to play as I have an exam tomorrow on Property.  Until next time folks.  God bless.

I woke up late to find that I am the only one who woke up late.  My sister went to work also my other room mate Ate Lanie.  I do not know why but I suddenly felt sad.  So I reached for my book and started reading; trying to forget that today is my birthday.  No food to prepare, no celebration, just reading like I use to do everyday.  When I feel like going to sleep again, I turned on my laptop and well opened my Facebook account.  There I see the first person to greet me was my professor in Obligation and Contracts during my undergraduate years; no other than the Honorable Board Member of the First District of Cotabato Province Atty. Celestino Rapacon.  what an honor to be remembered by one of the people who moulded my mind. 

My sisters Erika, Euvelyn and Eleonor  texted me too. Hmm...no celebration but I am happy.  As of now my wall is being flooded by the greetings of my good friends.  I love you all.  Thank you for making me happy today.  It is priceless.  My sweet friend Zailani has made this card for me.  Thanks Lan. Mwah!








I also have one given by Norhani last Friday but since I do not have my camera with me, I will post it later.  Thank you folks for putting a smile on my face.  

I am counting the days.  Six days more to go and I will be celebrating my birthday.  It is like it was only yesterday that I celebrated my birthday and now I am turning a year older again.  Another chapter of my life is about to open.  I am not worrying.  In fact, I am excited.  I am not afraid to get old although a lot of women fear old age.  There are also women who hide their real age.  Well, not me.  If somebody asks me about my age, I would readily tell how old I am.
 
Since I started working, I always give myself a gift on my birthday.  No matter how small or big the gift is but if it makes me happy then I would buy it for myself.  Last year, I bought a bracelet and laptop for myself.  This year, I already have an idea for a gift.  I am considering a laptop bag and a bag for my books.  Well anyway, what if I will just buy myself a mantle clock?  Not a bad idea either.  I do not want a party.  I only wanted to celebrate my birthday with my family; nothing luxurious as I am not used to it.  I would rather use my money to pay my tuition that spend it on having a party which is not a good thing to do when you are financially tight.

I believe that my birthday will just pass without doing anything fancy like having a lavish celebration.  What is important is to give thanks to God for giving me another year to live.
My sister Erika turned fifteen yesterday.  It cannot be denied anymore our baby is turning into a lady.  She is very shy now and very conservative. We celebrated her birthday at my sis Euvelyn's house.  She was a little disappointed as my father left for Manila yesterday.  To appease her, I bought this cake especially for her birthday. 

 I can't believe time is flying so fast.  I dread the day that she would come to me and ask if she can already have a boyfriend.  I do not want it to happen this early.  I want her to finish her studies get a degree, have a job and be successful before getting into a relationship.  I do not want her to be like the other young girls who became mothers on their teens as what is the norm these days.  I really want to protect her with all the best I can.  As much as possible, I do not want her to experience the hardship that we experienced in the past.  That is why I do everything that I can being her sister in guiding her as this is what teen-agers like her need.  I always speak to her not only as a sister but a friend.  I always remind her 
of the consequences of early parenthood. I let her learn from the experience of others.  As I always told her, the wise learn not from their own mistakes from the mistakes of others.  she does not need to make a mistake to learn.  I am happy with her choice of friends.  I know sometimes  I am very over protective but this is not for me but for her own good.  Enough of serious stuff.  Let's go to the lighter side.

Yesterday when we bought this cake, the clerk asked us why of all names we wanted to put Meow instead of her real name.  My sister has a lot of pet names and Meow is my favorite and I want her to feel that she is loved by putting her pet name instead of her real name that sounds so formal.  she may grow very old but to me, she will still be my baby.  The little girl that used to hold my hand when crossing the street.  The little girl that I love with all my heart.  My little Meow.
At last, my favorite month of the year finally arrived.  December always excites me for a lot of reasons.  This is the month that I feel like everyday is nothing but all about food.  A lot of families held reunions during this month.  Schools are also  having alumni homecoming like the high school where I graduated; my Alma Mater Notre Dame of Edcor is having a homecoming on the 30th.  I hope I could come.  I think December is all about celebration. 

Why I love December, simply because it is Christmas time.  The atmosphere is different.  Christmas songs can be heard over the radio again and again.  I could play my favorite Eraserheads song, Fruitcake again. For this month, there are a lot to celebrate.  

Let me start with my sister’s birthday on the 4th.  She will be turning 15 already.  How time flies so fast.  My boss’ birthday is on the 8th.  It is also the feast of Immaculate Conception, the patroness of my sleepy home town Alamada. My cousin Melan will be tying the knot on the 10th.  It is also the birthday of my dear friend Romel.  On the 12th is my own birthday (this is the foremost reason why I love December).  And of course, 25th,  Do I have to say it?  Yes, it’s Christmas!  Woot! 

December has its own charm.  People look happy.  Could the Christmas bonus responsible for it?